I haven’t blogged in a very long time. I was even thinking of shutting it down. Several reasons, but one main one I think, is because it didn’t feel honest anymore. I’ve been in-the-closet about something that I wasn’t ready to “tell”, and until I did, every time I sat down it felt like a “lie by omission.”
The man I got my divorce from. He’s not a man anymore. He had gender-re-assignment surgery last February and is now a woman.
That’s not why I got my divorce. We’ve had problems for years and it’s better this way. And to be fair to myself, I didn’t know [s]he was going to go “all the way” with this, till [s]he went all the way with this. I got divorced from a man who was experimenting with becoming a woman.
She’s happier now. Dresses much more feminine than I’ve ever been and says she’s never had a second thought or regret for doing what she had to do.
So, now that that’s out – back to blogging.
I have a new CD coming out, produced by R, (my ex-husband/musical collaborator/bandmate, and now, my roommate) (& yes, we still haven’t sold the house – just took it off the market again for the 3rd time – and that’s another story or couple of blog posts down the line). It’s in the mixing stages now and we have a big release concert coming up in February.
A reporter, who’s also a friend and who’s known me for years, is coming over tomorrow to do a story on me and my music, the concert and new release.
I said to him, “Should I talk about it?”
He said, “Think about it. I’ll respect whatever you want to do.”
It’s hard “not” to talk about it, it’s a lot of mental work and cerebral detours to avoid not talking about it.
First of all, my new CD that’s coming out, it’s called “Phoenix”, and as all the posters say, it’s a collection of songs about Grace, Change and Acceptance”.
And the unspoken question hangs in the air…. “Grace, change and acceptance? What do you mean by that? What personal experiences inspired you to write these songs?”
umm…… errrr……. [I’m not going to talk about this I’m not going to talk about this] See what I mean?
And here’s another one.
“R?” Who’s R? I can see by this press release that R has some amazing credits and has done some amazing work, but why have I never heard of her? And you two work so well together! How did you discover her and how did it happen that you two started working together?!”
umm…… errrr…….
Four years ago, in my projected vision of the perfect world, by now none of this would even be an issue. We would’ve gone our separate ways and [s]he would’ve done what she had to do, post-marriage and independent of anything to do with me.
But that’s not how it worked out. We’re still living together, very amicably. We will go our separate ways at some point, but for now, most of the time, we’re fine together. We’re family. We trust each other and know each others’ ways, so we make very good roommates.
The music is fantastic. This is absolutely the best work we’ve ever done together in over 25 years.
Was it John Lennon who said “Life happens when you’re busy making other plans?”
So, there you have it. My big reveal. It’s all out there. Movin’ on.
