About six months ago when I was in the mall I saw a big billboard for “Fresh Start Women’s Foundation” – a place for women in transition, and I made a mental note to check it out. I finally went there about a month ago – it’s an awesome place.
A pretty big, beautiful place downtown where they offer all kinds of speakers, counseling and links to social services and it’s free. They have a mentoring program there where they hook women up with someone standing on more solid ground:), usually in business, and then you get the support system of someone to talk to on a regular basis, who will be there to give you a leg up and help you reach your goals.
I’m not sure exactly what my goals are at this point. I have a bunch of options, and first and foremost, I NEED A MOMMY!!! Just kidding. No I’m not.
Anyway, I believe I wrote something to that nature on my mentoring application, but they still accepted me into the program. Once you fill out your application, there’s a four week preparation program you need to go through – one evening a week, with other women also entering the program.
I was driving over there last night for the first one and all kinds of prejudicial, judgmental thoughts came floating around in my enlightened head. “I don’t want to be sitting in a room with all these whiny, toothless victims telling their life stories. If we’re doing something like that, I’m outta here. I don’t want to hear it, get dragged down in it, etc. etc. etc.” Guess what? I think the only whiny victim in that room was me. But I do have good teeth:)
Anyway, so I get there and there’s around 30 strong, good-looking women sitting around a table in a boardroom telling their stories, reasons for being there. The woman sitting next to me was a young forensic pyschologist. She said, “you may think what I’m doing is pretty cool. I have my masters degree and I have a great job. But I’m here, in transition, because I don’t want to do this anymore and am ready to move on.”Then it was my turn. Ms. Cool here. “I’VE BEEN MARRIED 30 YEARS AND I’M GETTING A DIVORCE AND I HAVE NO MONEY AND I’M SCARED AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M GOING TO DO AND I MAY JUST RUN AWAY BUT MAYBE I’LL START A BUSINESS ONLINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!” All this blurted out on the verge of tears. I now have to accept this about myself, I am not that cool.
Then we went through this booklet of what’s expected of us as “mentees” and our mentor/mentee relationship, and one of the things emphasized was that the purpose of this relationship was not to help us in an emotional crisis. The mentors are not trained for that, and we, the mentees, were accepted into this program because (presumably) we’re all past crisis and ready to move on.
I like to think I am, but sometimes I get down into this place where the slightest little gesture of compassion makes me fall apart again.
Anyway, they have not (yet?) thrown me out of the mentoring program and I’m looking forward to getting to know this amazing looking group of women and getting my act together.
